Ahhh....the smell of love in the air or I just drove through Swink..one and the same..

My little Saxettes, sure hard pressed to believe that your favorite author would lead with such a negative title. Is he mad, is he lonely, what would cause this student of Eros to cast aspersions at his favorite past time. This would be akin to a steroid dealer refusing to walk into a weight room out of fear that all the naturally built posers would run him out of town. No, I have not gone all Alaskan rogue on you, but as the minutes tick away ending this officially anointed corporate day of love, as the young ladies working lotion stores attempt to scrub the horrible odor of all the fragrances combined out of their skin, and the sensitive women at Victoria's Secrets lay out those garments which, if paid for by a rate equivalent to how long they stay on a body, would bankrupt this peddler of these "why even bother to put it on trinkets" in a matter of days.

The problem, in my rambling mind, is the notion that, not dissimilar to other holidays meant to remind us to behave in a certain manner towards fellow human beings, for many it is a temporary fix. What prevents anyone for showing love and kindness on a daily basis to those they care about. I am not talking about buying the bouquet, or the candy, the card, but just basic, genuine acts of love and kindness.

Just like the other mentioned times in which, from the depths of who know where, we find a sudden rush of sympathy, compassion and understanding for fellow human beings, it all seems to be governed by the Gregorian calender rather than from inside our souls. Basis human kindness towards others is a rare virtue in a world flooded by a media which reports the vile nature of the rhetoric between those who govern our life. The idea of discourse aimed at advancing our society and at least attempting to guarantee all who live in it has been reduced to petty squabbling by petty individuals. We walk around this society more concerned about why we are not immediately responded to by text than examining a remedy for the inhuman conditions many live in as we enter the 21st century, a youth who feel entitled to privileges that most of us in the past were taught had to be earned. These are to but to name a few of the concerns we see in this world.

But within the collective soul of humanity, there are incredible answers to all these problems if we are willing to listen to each other and work together. As I develop more bag lines because of the passage of time, there is incredible hope in a time of despair. If we can only look inside ourselves for that basis goodness that exist in all of us, the answers will come to us if we only listen.

This notion was affirmed as I sat in a pew at one of our local religious gatherings listening to music. As I sat there, one of our fellow human beings who is in a bad way for now sat near me. As he removed his worn and tattered hat and unshouldered a backpack that probably carried everything he owned, he sat there enjoying the incredible sounds that permeated that building. I was there not to listen to scripture, but to see the praise band play, he seemed to be there to get out of the cold and rest. Then, this man, as lyrics talking about forgiveness and redemption were being sung, began to cry. Quickly, the crying turned to sobbing as tears streamed down his weathered face into a beard that was grey and matted. By the time I had returned, one of the older woman seated nearby had given this poor soul some tissue and was wiping these bloodshot blue eyes. And the band played on. I soon realized that this man had brought me to tears as I watched him deal quietly with whatever had brought on this cathartic episode.

Who was this guy? What was his story? Had I no friends in my time of need could that have been me? Had a person bent on my destruction and humiliation been successful, would I have resorted to a life of anonymity among the faceless people on the street? As I watched the look of empathy on the faces of those more affluent but just as human who were seated within earshot of this man, I was hopeful that their care and concern would extend outside the confines of a church and was confident that these people would have done the same if they saw him on the street. Being who I was, when the band stopped, I made like a banana and split prior to the sermon.(Been waiting to use that line from my favorite show for years).

Therein lies faith in humanity, for if this group could transfer this love that generated from their soul for a total stranger, then there is still incredible hope for all of mankind. It is in pockets that we can make a difference if we only make the effort. Even if we do not have all our own wits about, this does not prevent anyone from growing as a human being based upon their interaction with another.

We must learn to unleash our love and fulfill our inherent duties to others while not being tethered to a season for doing so. Giving of yourself and sharing experiences not only enhances the lives of others, but moves you forward in this quest for a happy, fulfilling and rewarding life. After all, isn't that what we are here for?

So Sez,
Sax

Guilt, I got it, yeah baby I got it...not!

The concept of feeling guilty about not feeling guilty is an interesting proposition for those of us entering such a foreign environment. As I sat there and pondered what as to what I had become, a realization returned me to a zen like comfort zone. There has to be a reason why, at such a tender age, sleeping at night has not become the ordeal that most would certainly want me condemned in light of my recent actions.


Well, in reality, when we know in our hearts that the right decision has been made for this point in time, and the Universe delivers to us a message confirming the choice, all can be good. The biggest challenge some of us live with is maintaining balance in a world determined to smash your inner gyroscope. After years of hard work and focusing on a result that will enhance you as a human being, and in turn benefit the world around you, we only have ourselves to blame if we moonstep to a place we do not want to land. If another insists on you following a destructive path, only you can allow yourself to enter that zone. At the same time, if we choose a place where one may not insist us to be, yet, out of some urge which arises out of our inner primordial sludge, we end up there, once again, who really is to blame.

What a wake up call when one listens to the signs and takes steps that moves them forward in life. The wisdom of an act is never viewed in a vacuum, but is clearly illustrated when a series of events then transpires that but for a right decision, the perfection of the universe's plan would not have been revealed. But then, the universe is in total balance.

So Sez

Sax

Affirmation

The One thing you will never see spew from this keyboard ever again is the term Savage Garden. But this band, who is loved by the oldest of my dearest, has a song by this name which reeks of positive vibes. But as all else in life, we have an amazing ability to seek this notion of affirmation, or reaffirmation (if we try to be real positive) through the actions of others.

This is very disturbing when we are in the process of ending relationships. It is a basic human desire to know that you are ok. Hell, there are books even titled in a manner that makes this a holy crusade. But in the end, this is another self destructive path because our self worth is left in the fickle mind and hands of another. Why we empower people who have had a tenuous or even non-existent impact in our life and thrust them into this position is a question we each much answer in ourselves. What is it in our atomic make-up that makes us decide others perceptions are more worthy than our own?

From the time we emerge, we are dependant on others for our survival on an infinite number of levels. We then rely on these around us to then wean us away so we may stand alone. Standing alone in a world that we perceive as cruel and not to be trusted is a daunting task...if you allow this in your mind.

But what happens if a decision is made to view the world in a different manner? What happens to us as people when we develop the ability to view our place in the universe through a positive lens? Will we have the urge to run to another when we end any kind of relationship? The word affirmation, in itself, depends on an outsider saying what is, is true, it is a positive statement or judgment. What if we knew our decisions and thoughts were, in themselves true, would there be a need to ever be affirmed.


It should be obvious that by now the caffeine has hit and the thoughts are rambling, but we as individuals can answer any of these questions to the satisfaction of ourselves...

Se Sez

We love to sing the Blues...

As I carefully lift the perfect Stones verse in order to match my mood, it is time to share some of the thoughts and feelings that have come to define the direction of my life. As my new found friend and I sang our wounded souls out in the one too many tourist traps of the Crescent City, the opportunity to reevaluate my life rose quicker than that oil which was spewing out of the bottom of the Gulf.

After spending 12 years too many with she who demanded the material world, the past few years have served as a continuing education on the nature of relationships. having met all sorts of incredible women who were rebounding more than any offenses in the NBA, I had settled nicely in the role of the rebound guy. While not one to complain from the nice company I was able to keep, albeit in short spurts, eventually something more permanent was bound to make it's way. After all, dying alone is not much fun. I don't think anyone of us really dies alone. This is a myth that is promulgated by nursing homes in order to fill all their beds with the two fer sales more appropriate for a schooner of beer.

Understanding what makes me tick has been the one part that seems to regress when I get "involved" with another. Ever wrap your grease soaked fingers around a unhealthy hamburger on a daily basis and in a month wondered why not even the big boy pants you had squirreled away in the recess of the closet get stuck on your now cellulite laden knees. Well, a funny thing happens to me the way to the altar. By wrapping my life around the issues and tribulations of another which were existed when the relationship started, balance went out the window and the same old Sax reappeared. Rehashing the whole knight in armor thing is getting old, but Marley starts showing up quoting verses from past posts.(Sorry it is Christmas). The blame lies squarely on my burlap shoulders for going down paths from which I have to make a conscious effort to remove the police tape riddled red flags before I transverse.

There are not many blues songs that are premised on notion that I did myself and someone else wrong for going out with a woman who was not perfect for what I need. But this last relationship showed me that if I still overlook what is the obvious, by the time I listen to those sent to watch over me there is a great possibility that I will hurt someone who loves me.
This was not in the plan, but if in your heart there is a loose end, no matter how much you love someone, it could unravel the relationship. We have an incredible ability to lie to ourselves on many different levels and really believe at the time that somehow this will not come back to haunt us.

So, the moral, if any, is that no matter how many self help books you comb through in this lifetime, if at the end you continue to deceive yourself on what will truly make you happy and rely on other fallible humans for this notion, things are not going to end in Disney princess fashion. be honest with yourself and listen to what our inner voice says, don't contort it to fit your immediate need. Only then can you begin to fulfill your own journey, instead of riding someone else's horse to the show...

So Sez,

Sax

I Hear the Hounds...

Yes my little Saxettes, just when you thought that yours truly was going to ride off in a rosy colored sunset as he made his way down to Boca in order to frolic in the sun with the octogenarians, I, like the Phoenix before me, am rising from the ashes and will make this a regular appearance. Swooning season is open as I share with the softer sex(unless you are in South Florida where the tanning oil is being watered down due to the price of crude resulting in more of a rugged, rawhide, leather tanning feel) the deep secrets of what makes a man a man and ladies glad of that.

I Having been to the below sea in New Orleans and seen the light at the House of Blues!

So, the newest journey commences with the sound of other sweep 'er off 'er feeters hot on my trial, as I morally and physically prepare myself to venture into the dark hinterlands of babe world. Please join me in raising a non-date rape laden drink and let us follow the red brick road paved with broken hearts and see what the future holds for this reprehensible lad...

So Sez,
Sax