One year ago, I got some news...

While I was strolling through the streets of a certain southern city, my phone rang one year ago, May 5, 2007 at 1:30 a.m. The number I recognized as a family member's who never would call me this late unless it was dreadful news. And it truly was. I was told that our father had just passed, I was in shock. Not that he had not lived an incredibly long and marvelous life, but the realization that this man, who I had taken for granted would be there, was gone. As fate would have it, my best friend was just showing up to the place we were all to meet and I was able to share with him that moment of grief.

The last time I had seen him was three months before and he was his cantankerous self. He had spent an incredibly reckless youth and had the opportunity to travel the world. He was in Morocco when the French still owned it and had many foreign legionnaires friends who died in the same jungles he would, 13 years later, spend a year and one half of his life. There were stories that I would hear with my friends for the first time which were hilarious and stories that I could not make up about his own antics when visiting my newly adopted hometown.

What I will never forget is how generous he was to strangers and his willingness to open his own home to a person in need, offering them refuge and food for a period of months. Whenever I needed help, he was quick to offer, although he had not agreed with some decisions I had made. We never fought, he closest we came was when the "Draculas" as he would label my friend and I would come in at 4:00 a.m. reeking of garlic pizza(covered up any odors) and have my car keys taken. No sweat, I had to work in 4 hours anyways and by 7:55 a.m I was jingling out the door.

When I first saw him, I could not cry, for it was the first time he was at peace. As I delivered his eulogy, I could not cry. I could look into the eyes of my best friend who had guided me in preparing the text and celebrated my father's goodness. My family had not only taken in my friend's mom, but had also offered him the same hospitality. We were not wealthy by any stretch of the imagination, but always were cared for and we learned from him the importance of friends in your life. As he grew older and received news from all over the world about some old buddy that had passed, I saw him slowly drawn into isolation. As grandchildren came into his life, there was a renewal, but age tooks it's toll.

Looking back on the changes that had recently occurred in my life, I can say that at the end, he was able to see his son happy. All my ups and downs over the years, he observed from a distance and refused to judge me. That I will be eternally grateful for and hope to emulate as my own friends and family deal with life.

So, Dad, I lift a glass to you and may your spirit enjoy the freedom it has justly deserved,

So Sez Sax......